Today I am deeply melancholy. I feel my lack of community deep in my soul. I am alone. I am lonely. Motherhood is the most isolating experience I have ever known. What once brought women together is the very thing that now keeps us apart. I long for a tribe of women to co-create motherhood: to laugh, to cry, to share with. They say it takes a village to raise a child, but there are no villages left. There’s postpartum, depression and competition. I have experience with all of the above and I’m not interested.
I sit at the river with my “tribe” one’s 5 and the other is 3. I remember the days of sisterhood. I never did anything without one. I had a sister for everything, a sister who was also a single parent, a sister to drink with, a sister to shop with, a sister to travel with…..the common theme among all those sisters is that when we were together we co-parented, co-cooked, we co-did all the things!! The most fascinating part: I was 17-23ish maybe cuz that’s super tribe time…..If I left the room my tribe would watch over my son, redirect him or parent him if needed. Now if I leave the room and one of my kids make a poor choice someone will whisper to someone else about how I’m parenting all wrong or how ill-behaved my kids are or some other such ridiculousness instead of helping a sister out.
Why is it as we grow older we shut out our sisters? We pretend all is ok, and we hide!
We convince ourselves we can do it all by ourselves. But why should we? Why the hell would we want too?
I want to share my good shit and my bad shit and all my shit. I want to feel a deep rooted connectedness in my day to day living; connectedness to people (not the screen I type on), connectedness to truth, realness and authenticity of self and sisterhood.
I sat in my melancholy for two days. I felt my feelings. I honoured them. I did not try and change them. I know I am not the only woman who feels this way. I hear it everywhere I go. I was guided to create this space for all of us. To come together and be real, be raw, be seen and be heard. Welcome sisters, welcome to this “village”.